At around 11:00 PM last night, I received a call from Keren that my dad may have possibly gotten into an accident. It was not yet verified because the family thread on Facebook came from our cousin Bea who asked if anyone was online to answer. Keren was intrigued, so she called and found out. My tita then called me a few seconds after to let me know of the accident –sketchy as it is with the details, but for sure it was my dad. Nobody yet had any passable information except that they received a call that my dad got into an accident. We would later find out it was a hit and run.
There’s a lot going on in my mind right now, but i’m not about to lose it. In fact, I have this sense of just going along with the information and pray through them. It was this peace I can’t define as yet.
Yet as I work, I keep getting distracted by the images being sent back and forth through the Facebook family thread, and I teared up when I saw papa in pain. It’s because I’ve never really seen my dad in the hospital. For as long as I can remember, I’ve never seen him in the hospital. I’m the one that’s usually in the hospital, being so injury prone as I am. Papa’s health isn’t perfect, but he’s also never been admitted. To hear of his unimaginable pain, how even a sip of water gets him choking (risk alert!) and also to hear about how lacking the hospitals have been so far in addressing his pain –we just wish we can cure it all right away.
I slept for only 5 hours today. I haven’t gotten much work done today –only because I am pretty swamped and there’s A LOT to do. Yesterday, our staff also did not show up and eventually took an absence without leave. So on top of being staff-less at work the past 9 days since before the new year, and then having to hear of my dad’s accident at 11:00 PM last night, I’m now confronted with the fact that I have a staff that’s permanently gone missing. No staff for the entire month until we hire a new one! Couldn’t have come at a worse time, and it’s just a little bit too much for the start of 2018, right?
Well, when it rains, it pours.
The same can be said of blessings in small and big ways. I have an excellent source of encouragement from my friends from CCC and church in Makati. They keep themselves updated and actually ask how things are. Sometimes, instead of hearing people pray for you, it’s the actions that mean more, like when a friend suddenly messaged me that she would like to help out more about the hit and run incident. Or when a friend sent me a verse to encourage me. It’s when I pour out to friends (and actually hear back from them) that I feel encouraged, because we’re not robots that just sound off to people. We are relational beings and like that we hear from people rather than see them pop up as “seen zoners”.
Anyway, like most days, I’ve forgotten to eat today. I usually eat once a day. I don’t have the energy to go out since I have a lot on my lap right now –And I’ll probably just order. Palawan’s order delivery food sucks. I basically just have Jollibee on dial.
When the call came through last night, surprisingly, instead of fear, I had this unimaginable peace in my heart that assured me that whatever came of this, it was going to be alright. And I realize that God works that to truth through a lot of things –people around us, words of encouragements, prayers. His abiding presence is one you cling to for days like today when you’re face is breaking out from stress and you lack sleep and are hungry and just overwhelmed with work….and still have a sense of peace. I don’t know how to explain it.